Us Letters
by Ducky275
Summary: Let me start off by saying that I have worked on my fair share of cases, allowing me to take in the reality and the severity of a human life. I ask L and Roger to not classify this as suicide note. For pity is not the reason I am writing this to leave behind. -A
1. Chapter 1

I don't own any characters or places this is all by the wonderful creators of death note!

Us Letters. 

Let me start off by saying that I have worked on my fair share of cases, allowing me to take in the reality and the severity of a human life. I ask L and Roger to not classify this as suicide note. For pity is not the reason I am writing this letter. I imagine there will be some confusing theories once I'm found lying in the very place you all so graciously took me in. I also am taking into account I live amongst the greatest minds of our world, including being raised and trained to be a successor to the worlds greatest detective. I imagine this would only justify your already formulated theories. But never the less I will continue on. Assuming that, there is a 98% chance that it will not only be L and few others will read this. I plan on telling the whole story. What has occurred throughout my life at the Wammy house, how I met B… and how it has progressed to my decision to take my own life. I would like to acknowledge the fact that I do not plan on giving any personal history of my life before the Wammy house for this will only shed more light on my now non-existence. After reading this I hope this to be my last shadow that I leave upon the world, and hope to simply fade from the memory in which I left behind.

As an introduction to those of you reading this that are not my fellow letters from the Wammy house. I am A. I am the first child who has been brought to the Wammy house as the successor to L. I have been living here since the age of 4; the events before this will remain untouched. The Wammy house has grown since then, and progressed into a much larger group of children and teenagers. I myself am 19, or for this matter I was 19. Being the first, I had the most time to adjust to the life that I was set to live and take the place of someone who continued to be out of reach. After myself was B. Also known as Beyond Birthday, Rue Ryuzaki or B.B. He was my first friend as well as my first enemy. He had black raven hair along with very dark eyes that almost seemed to have a red twinge to them when he would stare. His hunched back made him seem shorter than he actually was, but even crouched in his horrible posture he still remained to be 6 foot tall. No matter the time of day he always seemed to smell of sweet strawberries. Most certainly the obsession with strawberry jam being the main cause for this. For sweet was not a scent that suited Beyond Birthday. His plain white long sleeve shirt and baggy jeans only seemed to justify my conclusion of his self-representation, or rather the opinions of others in which he never acknowledged. B, along with many other letters, joined us throughout the years. Some sociable, other who wanted their distance. The Wammy house was not a place to make friends. We would listen, learn and adapt to place these new skills into a scenario that may appear within the near future. Me, being the first in line and the most obvious the succeed L am somewhat of a road block for you other letters. But fear not; that block has been removed. As for you B, I understand and can predict that after reading this you will no longer remain at the Wammy house. No matter. This story shall soon become clear and to an end for this shall be the only such remainders of what was told to be A from the Wammy house.


	2. Chapter 2

Death note chapter

Looking back on it now I have come to an understanding with the methods in which we are tested at this orphanage that I so openly call home. What is it that people fear most? Some may believe it to be death, heights, spiders and in some cases thunder; the answer varies from person to person creating an overwhelming amount of theories. All of these fears can simply be summarized into one collaborate conclusion. The unknown. No one can see the future, for we are not gods. The crude realization of not knowing when you're going to die frightens people. The thought of not knowing if you may wake up to see your loved ones. Everything raveling and constricting to the thought of not knowing what is going to happen. This is what makes deductive skills the crudest yet most assertive method in the world. Something that every human possess but they simple cannot face facts and predict the sequence in which a decision will play out. This is what makes us letters the best at what we do. Sense we are expected to live up to our mentor L, our abyss of life was a competition from the very beginning. From the moment that I walked into the Wammy house till the moment I take my last breath. At the beginning I was questioned and experimented. The assertiveness of intelligence was approved but the anticipation of my success was yet to come in the future. At the beginning I was alone. I was still young and may I add I was the only female for quiet some time. Being the only child I went through a sequence of drills every day varying from math, English and history to constructing scenarios and fighting. This dawned the reluctant pursuit of my exhausting training. It was only a short six months that I had my begun my fruitless attempt to spend the rest of my life under that glamorized schedule. A Thursday marked 6 months, that I had been at the Wammy house. I had recently finished my history class and was allowed a small break due to the new child that was announced to arrive that day. I had begun to devoir yet another one of the caramel candies that I still enjoy to eat profusely. I could not quiet comprehend what my thoughts were, if I was excited to have another person who was only a few months younger than me. Spending the rest of their life with me at this orphanage, home, school call it what you will. Or was I doubtful, the malicious thought of having someone being by my side at all times. Attempting to take the place that I had already begun to strive for at only the age of 5. Jealousy. Something we were not supposed to fall prey to but never the less the curiosity have taken the front seat and enveloped my impudent young mind. I strode down the hallway my left arm behind my back; my finger continuously raveling my long hair. Tossing another one of my favorite candies into my mouth as I pondered over the new so called class mate that stood on the other side of Roger's office door. Every step filled with anxiety that seemed to leach throughout my body. Once arriving to Rogers's door at the end of the long hall. I came to a halt; I began to run many naïve ideas of what the child may look like, Boy of girl? Fat or skinny? What race? Smart obviously. In all retrospect I was still young and my mind had generic priorities at that age. I glanced down to my feet taking a long desired glare at my small shoes that looked like ballerina slippers. I wiggled my feet as I continued to think about the severity of this child being a superior successor than myself. I am A. I reassured myself; I am the first successor, should it not be obvious whose mind was truly superior? Was it the fear of being replaced? Or the thought of this child taking away my home. This fear was manipulative and overbearing. The thoughts continued pacify my movements. My mind was rambling sending me into a frenzy of questions. One of my teachers Hisoka who walked slowly behind me placed a hand on shoulder causing my spiraling mind to snap out of its thoughts. I turn my head to flash a glimpse at him. His dark brown hair shook as he nodded and gave me a very light push. Reinforcing me to move along. The persistent questions were only moments from becoming clear. Rogers door slowly pushed open as this marked the day I first saw him. B.


	3. Chapter 3

Death note chapter 3

It would be unfair of me to portray every child that came to the Wammy house as emotionless parasites, walking around as robots with no human emotions. There was only a hand full of us who simply remained quiet and restrained ourselves from the idea of being social. I cannot say for certain as to why we do this. There were many children who enjoyed socializing; watching movies and playing games together, most of them in fact. They laugh and smile, joking and playing with each other 'till the sun sets. Enjoying what you believe to be a normal childhood; with the exception of the fact that our lives were anything but normal. I continue to acknowledge the fact that I am cold; a bitter vessel that consists only of logic and facts. So perhaps I am or was an emotionless parasite. Since I was indeed the first child at the Wammy house, I had far more experience than the other children and was held in somewhat of a higher regard. Knowing that 'till this day I was the top successor. Thinking about it now, I have come to the conclusion that this was part of my undoing. But that is another matter entirely. I am straying from the point. I'm sure it would be thrilling to hear of how my first encounter with B was dramatic, full of anticipation and emotions to make your stomach turn. In all reality it was only one thing. An introduction to the boy who was planned to follow along with myself. Another pawn to toss into the playing field. If you would assume that we would relate to each other and wanted to seek a friendship from the very beginning, then you could not be more wrong. B and I almost never spoke, the silence was everything. Although we spent every day together, at each other's sides, we never said a word unless necessary. Not that I'm complaining. If I truly desired a friendship I very well believe I would have made an effort. Again, if I wanted to. Throughout the years B and I never conversed, his silence was joined with a set of piercing eyes that would give you the impression that he could see into the very abyss of your mind. This would give me an uneasy feeling every time that I would somehow make eye contact with him. After meeting the new boy we were quickly thrown into classes together. Being each other's partners for almost everything, since there were no other children. B was given a room as I myself was given once arriving. Once opening the door to the room, you would be placed in a short, wide hallway that expanded into an open room of a decent size. The right corner had a bed and a night stand, to the left a window accompanied by a small fridge. We also had closets with dressers, and our own personal washrooms in our rooms. Nothing too special or extraordinary but nice enough sense we spent a lot time in our rooms. Or at least I did. At the beginning every room near mine was completely empty. That rapidly changed, only three short weeks after B arrived, we were joined by many more. It seemed as if it took no time for these modest rooms to fill themselves with new owners. I found myself always wondering: where did all these children come from? I knew why I was here, but how did they decide who was worthy to come live here, and what were the requirements that we all clearly met? Everything was always taken care of for us. When we wanted our fridges filled or personal essentials we would simply fill out a list and write our room numbers on it. Never making money but always spending it. We had a large kitchen area that was always open to our convenience, lots of tables that allowed us to sit and enjoy, once again giving those who wanted to socialize a chance to sit with their "friends." After some time there were a decent amount of us. Every one of us was different, another personality, a different look about us. I myself never really enjoyed or even thought about the idea of making "friends." I was there to become something greater than what I was, and yet I remain to be that pawn never capturing the king and winning. It seems as if in the end, I'm still not the one.

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Thanks so much for the reviews and for reading! Little hint for the next chapters, it will actually get more into the events that happen so hope you guys take a look!


	4. Chapter 4

Death Note chapter 4

I presume my overbearing reflectiveness of the Wammy house has become rather tiresome. Allow me to get straight to the point. This will objectively turn us to me at the age of 17. Two years ago, at this point I had become an expert at every turn. Not diverting from my path, a true formality of what was expected of a successor. B was always close behind. At this point I had no real opinion left for B, or any other letters for that matter. As I myself had grown throughout the years so had B. Although his height increased he never lost the disturbing slouch. His dark hair was long and enveloped his face with darkness; and yet still remaining with his fearful eyes that never ceased to give me the same chill up my spine. Everything had been going in order until one faithful day; my entire perspective was changed from just one fighting simulation. I question if I could go back now would I still chose the same path that I did that day? As usual I was awoken by the sound of my music box opening and humming it' gloomy song. The comforting sound complemented my ever so bitter attitude. Like every morning I would slide out of bed and drag myself to the washroom to get a glance at what the night had done to my already gungy appearance. Gazing into the mirror I observed myself. My bangs swopped draping over the side of eye and streamed down the left side of my face meeting the rest of my golden brown hair that flowed down to the small of my back. My eyes almost matching the same light brown color of my hair accompanied by clean face with my light freckles that spotted on my cheeks. Brushing through my hair I continued to hum to my music box until I finished cleaning up. Afterwards I strolled to my closet and quickly threw on my turquoise long sleeve shirt that hugged. Then slipping on my jeans that were not too baggy nor too tight fitted. Before doing anything else I skipped over to the fridge and took a hand full of caramel candies and slide them all into my pocket. After all it was not a normal day if I did not have my snacks with me. Content with my normal morning ritual I placed my black ballerina shoes on before closing my door and making my way to the gym for my first class of the day. Fighting.

Letters cheerfully chatted and laughed well slowly making their way to the gym. Amusing themselves with their mindless chatter. I myself walked alone raveling myself in thoughts that would actually had benefit unlike the rest. A slight pinch in my heel caused me to grit my teeth. Curious to meet the cause of my pain I turned my head to browse the source behind me. My eyebrow raised in curiosity once seeing B following very closely behind me. He looked down at my foot then trailed his sight up my body to meet my eyes. Throughout this entire time he never said a word. No apology only the sounds of footsteps. The door for the gym caused me to look forward to enter the large room. Once everyone had arrived to the gym we all went to our designated sparring matts. The objective was to best your opponent. B and myself were paired together. The natural order A and B, C and D, E and F and so on. In all reality my manipulative manner of always proclaiming myself to be the best was the main cause of this unusual situation. B and I took our stances at each end of the matt. Bending my knees and placing one arm in front of myself and intended the other behind my body. Fixating on my partner who eyes were locked onto me. I began to wonder how could he not apologies? He just gave me that exact look that he was bestowing on me now. I squinted my eyes in curiosity. Is it because he never talks? The irony of me thinking this since I almost never spoke either, or maybe he just wasn't sorry?

Our teacher sounded the whistle forcing me to stop my train of thought to concentrate on the task at hand. Being the first for everything I automatically ran and lunged with the first kick high enough to hit his face. My leg glided through the air to make contact with the back of B's forearm. Throwing punches and kicks from every angle this was a constant battle back and forth throwing attacks just to be blocked. I then decided to kick once again that got turned down in a matter of seconds. Trying to counter me B threw a strong punch. Finally an opening, moving my body to the side and grasping his punching arm, I fluidly swept my leg around in to circle motion sending B's legs into the air. B harshly hit the ground and grunted in pain. As always, I was very competitive but my demanding ego made me believe that the fight was finished. My demising attitude did not prepare me for the chance of change. The smirk built across my face in victory. Feeling accomplished I turned around beginning to stretch my bones from the battle. My eyes shot open in horror, the next thing I knew my hair fluttered in my face. My arms flaring up in regret. The shock caused me gasp, the floor knocked what little air I had left out of my lungs. I coughed in my attempt to regain some of the oxygen that I had lost. My back ached in pain absorbing conformation that I was now laying on the floor; pain creaked through my bones. The cold hard floor had made its mark on my body that was going to bruise. Still stunned and confused as to why I was on the ground, I began to slowly attempt to pull my torso up to a sitting stance. As if I had not been in enough shock I was slammed immediately back into the cold surface. Knocking my body back down B rolled his body, easily slipping his left leg over me and placing his hands on my wrists constraining me tight in place. Ignorant bastard. Being so quick I had barely any time to react not to mention the fact that I was still confused and dazed from the first fall let alone being slammed back into the floor. This patronizing scenario was out of place I could have never predicted this, for it had never happened before. Sneering in pain once again I comprehended that he had taken the time to secure me and his victory. Closing my eyes tightly in hopes that I could simply blink and this would not be happening, once opening my eyes I came into contact with the a pair of dark ones staring at me. His eyes accompanied with a smile that played maliciously across his lips. I hissed in anger, was that a challenge? My rebellious attitude flared, his confidence only seemed to flue my boiling emotions. Perhaps I could still win; I tried to shake him, moving my legs and wiggling my attempting to break his grasp. What was worse than the tight hold he had was the eyes that remained locked onto me. I continued to wiggle around. In response he placed his knee on my upper thigh to stop me from struggling with my legs. Trapped.

My only moveable part had been locked in place; the hope of his hands loosening was a foolish one. It was once I realized that I was completely powerless that I came notice how close he was. His warm breath swiftly tickled across my cheeks as the smell of strawberries enveloped my senses. The tips of his pitch black hair brushed my face, unaware of my thoughts he moved his head slightly to side in curiosity. He wanted me to say it. To admit that he had bested me. He arrogance sent me into a whirlpool of frustration snapping myself from the daze that I was in. The more I refused, the higher his satisfaction continued to rise but conveniently for him in this situation he was in charge. Growling in frustration, I took my breath in trying to calm myself before I was belittled anymore. Not being able to handle the eye contact he was seeking. I closed them in refusal. I turned my head to the side, my eyes shut in all attempts to avoid shame.

"Get off." Short and sweet, I may not have said that he had won but this was exactly what meant defeat. Expecting him to raise himself immediately, I opened my gloomy eyes and stared at the floor. To my surprise a shadow covered my face from the bright lights above. I glanced to see the dawning source of the shade. B's face only inches from me. He continued to stare at my disapproval. The sly smile still clear and present on his face, my eyes encroached with annoyance. What's worse was he made me endure it. The powerful grip he had, the face to face. All to show who had won. I huffed in anger refusing to look at him anymore. Upon my stubbornness he let out a small chuckle letting one last puff of air hit my face. In a matter of seconds I felt the weight being removed from me. My legs and arms being released. In dismay and shame I laid for a moment letting out a large sigh. Crunching my body into a sitting position. Wallowing in it, a hand presented itself in front my vision. I glanced above to get a look at who wished to come to my aid. B stood there with a stupid large smile and offering me a gracious hand. This made me chuckle in repulsion. In a moment of falter I almost wanted to gasp his welcoming hand. Once again the realization of what had happened caused me to narrow my eyes, loathing the very thought. Declining his offer I shot a glare and boosted myself up to a standing position without any help. Absorbing his rejection he retracted his hand that he so openly offered to me, placing it comfortably in his pocket. B didn't budge, he remained observing me. What is he looking at? He's lucky that I don't clock his in the chin. He continued to watch me in awe. I felt like an animal at the zoo being mocked. Not knowing what he was waiting for I snapped my eyes cringing my face with defeat. Without a word he spun on his heel; the only sight I was left with was his back as he walked away. His attempt to show that even a king can be removed from there pedestal. This was not over I thought to myself hearing the whistle sending us to our next class.

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Thanks for reading! For the next chapter expect some look at the other letters and some actual conversations start!


	5. Chapter 5

Death note chapter 5 

Death is hard to understand, the finality of it. The trauma haunted me; resentment and doubt were clouding my mind. Although I try to never fixate on something that can't be changed for it is a waste of my time and intelligence, but his casual egotistical actions were the only thing on my mind. Closing my eyes while I laid in my bed. Recalling over every event that had occurred today like a full length film. After vindictively watching him walk away without a word. It was then I realized the silence surrounding me. The large group of eyes weighting me down. The letters stood in awe at the events that had taken place right in front of them. There lingering eyes seemed to make it all the more drastic. Although they all seemed laconic, their eyes spoke a thousand words. As I laid there brooding in disinclination my back sent a ferocious pain through my neck causing me to jerk. I messaged my neck with my hand, rolling soft circles into my skin, the indigent feeling still spiraling in my stomach at the thought of B's belligerent actions that was causing my pain. My eyes shut softly as I continue to rub my neck for relief. My thoughts raveled around, constricting to the one problem, Beyond Birthday. Recalling the powerful grip that I fought so hard to escape, he held me there so effortlessly. My process of escape was distracted many times by the warm scent of strawberries that enveloped my senses. The tips of his raven black hair barely touching my skin and sending me into a different mindset than battle. ENOUGH! I yelled to myself in horror, I was simply mocking my own failure. There was nothing left to be done, to think I was stooping so low as to give him the satisfactory. I lectured myself for some time consumed in thoughts until I finally let sleep take over me.

Slowly walking into the open room feeling the curly carpet folding under my thin shoes. Although it was completely silent in the room I could hear the sound of the carpet shuffling under me. Standing there for some time in the dark room that only had one lamp on. The darkness enveloped everything. I could still make out Roger but it gave a much darker image to him than I was used to seeing.

"Roger? You wished to see me?" I said while I rubbed the back of my calf with my toes.

Roger took the second to look me up and down and close his notes that he had been working on before I had made him notice my presence. Although it was Roger he seemed off somehow. Someone I have known sense I can remember, not once had he given me a look quiet as cold as the one I had just received. His normal warm welcome was no longer present and his scornful face glanced at me in disgust. Annoyingly he began to tap his pen on his large wooden desk all the while he continued to stare at me with that same displeased look that dragged on his face.

"You're a nuisance; I should have just gotten rid of you when I found you." He said, straight to point and very blunt.

Hearing these words come from his mouth caused me lose some of the air I had been holding in anticipation. My eyebrows cringed at the very sound of these words reaching my ears. His tone made me suffer that much more under his gaze. We letters may have biological parents but have never really had a mother and father. Most of us were brought here when we were very young making this our home. Some of the children do not even remember there parents. Being the first I had received much more attention when I was the only one. Roger specifically was closest to me. Even though our parents were not as yours are today, he was closets thing I could imagine having parental guidance would be like. The only person who sought to make me greater than the pathetic low life I would have become was him. This relation made it harsher and made me acknowledge that he thought of me as a failure, a disappointment. As much as I fought to control myself I was so ashamed I spoke out in defence.

"Roger.. I…I…" Stuttering as I tried to compos myself in order to explain.

"I simply lost my footing, it was a onetime thing..I" Before I could continue my speech was cut off by the sound of Protesting.

"No A, you may feel that this is indignant but is it you that is the problem here. Your worthless A, this was the only reason for you to live. Someone has taken that away from you sense you can no longer be seen as a pawn we needed you to be. Your useless, accept it so you do not take more of my time on your pitiful life. Your efforts will always fall shy. We no longer have need of something like you." This was chaotic and could not be happening. I could never be simply tossed to the side. I am A the only one whom can take the place of L. I let my guard down once, I can fix it! This could not be enough for them to not acknowledge me as L's first successor. Or perhaps was roger right? Was it me? Am I not good enough! This is why I live I cannot just be tossed aside. I have spent my entire life being molded to their preferences. That is an understatement this is my life, everything I have lived for, every day that I breathe is only so that I can become what I am expected to. This is why I fight and my mind wonders through every possibility that could occur. Why I have bruises on my back and strains in my neck. The only reason for me to live; and now I'm to be passed aside as I'm not A. No it's because I'm A that one simple mistake is going to cost me my life. Or was it B? Was it him that robbed me of my future by turning me into a fool? Although my mind was travelling thought many thoughts, on the outside I remained reformed and stiff as a statue as I was always instructed when dealing with emotional situations. Roger shuffled with his papers almost as if I was no longer there. On cue my body became stiff as two arms snacked their way around my upper body holding my arms tight to my chest. Someone was holding me secure in place. Panicking in my mind but my body had no response it just sat there ideally. The person was larger than me as my head sat under there chin. The body pressed tightly against me, at that moment warm skin slid across the back of my head hugging close to my skin to make its way to my ear. Warm air blew on my skin while it passed across me making my legs buckle. My mind screamed at me to fight, I could get out of this no problem, do something…ANYTHING! My bones remained none responsive. The only movement I got was a slight tilt of my head to the left allowing better asses to my ear. That was no movement of mine, I felt like a rag doll being moved without consent. Because of my head being slightly turned I could see the white long sleeve my captor was wearing along with black hair pressed against me. B. His lips now laid thread distance away from my ear. He continued to breathe softly onto my burning skin. Attempting to struggle was worthless just as before he had me at bay awaiting his actions. He squeezed a little tighter holding me with no room escape. His breath upon the nap of my neck made my face light fire. So powerless. My head that was slightly titled to the side flew into a frenzy making me feel light headed. The hot air tingling through my spine making me shiver against his body. Only was whisper was said then. Taking in a small breathe he hushed.  
"Looks like I win."

My eyes snapped open with disbelief as I launched my body forward in dismay. My mind and body were brought back to reality. Gasping and panting at the shame of it. I patted my bed for some kind of conformation that this was real and that the previous situation was in fact a dream. My heart raced faster than I could possibly imagine it would after a simple dream. It was only when I rubbed my head that I realized the heat radiating from my cheeks. This was cowardly and childish. L's successor? No. I was acting as a mere child would, clouded by emotions. My apathy soon returned along with my altruistic attitude. I continued to lecture myself as I headed to the bathroom to rid myself of the fire on my face.

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Hi guys! thanks for reading, if you find any errors please let me know, I promise very soon I will get into actual conversation between B and other characters. I hope you guys enjoy!


	6. Chapter 6

Death note chapter 6

I find this somehow amusing yet frustrating that someone who was completely stalwart to the idea of facts, no emotion; was revealed to be a verbose human being captivated by non-logical thinking. The more I recall of what had happened to get to the position of taking my own life I wonder how it is I could have been so easily manipulated. I will never approve of the approach that I have taken; the pressure…this is the only way to run away from it all to a place that even you can't follow me.

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The bags under my eyes appeared while I had glanced at the mirror in my room. Clearly showing I had lost sleep the previous night. This gave more of a callous demission to my appearance.

Walking into my class, that I was a few minutes early for. B sat in the far corner in his seat fingers deep in a container of jam. Attempting to control the desire to prove that I was not effected by what had taken place in our sparring. I made my way to my seat beside him. Placing my hands tightly around a book as a method to not having to pay attention to my surroundings.

My ears twitched at the sound of B closing his now empty jam container. He raised his legs holding them close to his chest resting his hands on his knees. Once positioned to his likening, he turned his head to look at me.

Expecting him to glance then look away I became rather confused when he remained staring. Nervously I took many glances from the corner of my eyes trying to make him turn away once acknowledging that I noticed him staring but oddly it seemed to increase the weight of his eyes that were fixated in me. Agitated my teeth began to nibble on my lip, like stone he sat there. Could he truly be so naïve to think I could not see him? No, he knows I can see him; he is doing it on purpose. Deciding to face him head on after what felt like hours of his gaze irritating me, I turned to make eye contact with the over bearing boy.

Meeting his gaze with a glare of my own. We sat still staring at one another, not a single word said nor did our eyes falter from one another. His black hair fell so graciously across his face leaving just enough room for his devil stained black eyes to captivate my own. Trapped in my own thoughts as I'm sure he was, a large smile arose from his flattened strawberry scented lips. As a result of his deleterious smile, my stomach discorded with confusing and unsettling feelings as to why he was smiling. Baffled I raised an eyebrow in question all the while he sat there…..smiling as if something about me amused him. Maybe I should look away? No do that and he wins again… I was snapped from my daze by the sound of E slamming his books down on the desk in front of mine.

F other known as Fever Fyfe followed directly behind him as always. F and E were never without one another, following as if they were connected by a cord. E has always been the headstrong one between the two. Always the one making the remarks while F follows throwing in the off comment on occasion. Being the youngest and yet the more reserved one between the two. His platinum blond hair, with bangs that fell lightly to the side, the remainder of his hair was a complete mess of spikes; along with light brown eyes. He always wore a dark red long sleeve with black pants that were not too baggy or too tight. Following near B and myself in age also meant that they were both taller than myself but not by too much.

On the other hand E looked rather different. Dirty blond hair that had light spikes in different direction giving him a bed head look. His hair parted on the left and seemed to have a large peek spike surrounded by the rest of his messy hair. His pale skin due to the fact that all of us lacked sun light really accentuated his storm blue eyes. As for clothing he preferred his black sweater with a white shirt underneath along with a pair of jeans that seemed comfy enough. Not as if they mattered to me they were just two other letters.

I crossed my arms and laid my head down upon my desk, after all I was I still very tired. It had been two nights that I have gone with next to no sleep due to certain circumstances that I would not like revisit in shame. E slid his chair into my desk as far as he could until they clashed into each other. His face sat inching in front of mine only a little higher, making me look up slightly. He was so close his breath made the bangs on the side of my face shake when he exhaled. What does want that he has to come to so close for? Somewhat discussed of him being so close I shot him an assertive glare hoping he would take that as a sign to kindly fuck off. I then looked down to my desk not wishing to interact with him.

Letting out a quiet chuckle before he spoke

" So tell me sweet thing, what was it like having your first time on the bottom?"

This provocative comment not only caught my attention, but B's as well. E and F both began to laugh. My fists clenched, enveloping themselves with anger. Who does he think he is? I should hit him. Give him a concussion and be done with it. Was it truly worth it? What would roger say?

While debating between my thoughts of what I would like to do, knowing full well that I would not do anything. Raising my head from my arms and placing my hands gently on my desk as I sneered at E with disgust. No matter how much I hated this conversation I could not be bothered with them. E knew then that he had lost my attention and sought to quickly regain it. He came closer to my face so that he could whisper, yet making sure that B and F could hear him. After all I'm sure he would not want to deprive his friend of the gratification.

"Maybe you and I can wrestle it out later, now that I know I can be on top."

His comment made me slither in my own clothes. Curious of the thought if B was still listening I looked through the corner of my eyes to see; E saw me attempt to look at B and used it against me.

"Or is it only B that gets special treatment. I can pin you down too if you want."

I looked down trying to avoid the entrancement; I don't want to talk about this anymore. Not that I ever wanted to but this was enough.

" Could you shut up?" I huffed. I normally don't enjoy talking with any letters never mind a conversation such as this.

He laughed at my request "oh come on I promise to be even more forceful."

As he spoke I was forced to smell him, his breath upon my face. Something was different from the last time I had been this close to someone's face. Not as sweet and intoxicating, but I could not quiet put my finger on it. Oh right he doesn't smell like strawberry's. WHAT!? At a time such as this I was thinking of the differences between Beyond Birthday and Eternal Eury..I should not be allowing anyone to control me and my thoughts. Being completely distracted I hardly noticed when E slowly moved in closer. My eyes grew to a size that I did not even know possible. Suddenly his chair got bumped back from mine. E gripped my desk and his upon losing his balance. B stood there looking down at E, his face completely blank. Eternals focus was no longer on me but on B who had just bugged his desk along with him with it. I'm not completely sure as to why B bumped into him. To be honest we may be taught everything you could imagine but never was entrusted on a situation such as this. Perhaps I should study more? I'm nothing but a child. How could I have let it get that far? I was so distracted with my own thoughts and observations. With all these situations occurring I will soon be out of pride and dignity.

" My apologies " said B in a complete mellow tone.

Never the less B's apology was empty, no true sympathy it was such a belittling manner that it seemed to ignite E's fury. B continued walking with his jar in his left hand. He placed it in the garbage and returned to his seat. Thankfully once B sat back down our teacher gripped the attention of our class. E clenched his jaw and stared at B who was looking down at his book not even acknowledging anyone's presence. That was by far the most bazaar situation that had ever unfolded in front of me. This coming from someone who deals with death, murder and crazy people's thoughts day and in and day out. Someone who walks and talks like a zombie from one of those movies that people watch.

" The seven sins of mankind, someone please explain them to me? Anyone?"

* * *

The static on the computer screen that clearly outlined the letter L on the monitor. Every child within the room was filled with something unexplainable when hearing the sound of his voice. To us he was placed a pedestal that each one of us was striving to be even a mere shadow of. Questions were thrown from the very mouths of us letters in hopes to get the response from our mentor. He was kind and respectful and casually made jokes to ease the tensing within the room. Smiles grew upon many faces like hope was thrust into their very beings. Although I may not have contributed, I listened intently documenting every moment in my mind. After sometime perhaps the most important question was asked.

"L, is there anything your scared of?" S may never know the severity of his question at this point in time. Many kids poked at him insisting that L was not afraid of anything.

"Well I suppose …monsters. There are many types of monsters in this world who will not show themselves and cause trouble. Monster who abduct children; monsters who devour dreams. Monsters that suck blood and monster who tell lies. Lying monsters are the worst, they are much more cunning than other monsters. They pose as humans even though they have no understanding of the human heart. They eat even though they have never experienced hunger. They study even though they have no interest in academics. They seek friendships even though they don't know how to love. If I were to encounter such a monster I would likely be eaten by it because in truth am that monster."

This raised more question for me than I ever thought possible. L thinks of himself as a monster? Everything described sounds so cold and demonic that it is almost evil. Perhaps to hunt evil one must be evil themselves? Or perhaps be lacking the characteristics that define us as humans? Am I such a monster as well? Who could possibly know I have never tried to have friends, or understand the human heart. I must understand the human mind and how they think. I speak of people as if they are all aliens surrounding me, a different species that I am here to decode. Or perhaps I am the monster amongst the ordinary…If I am a monster does that B is one as well? B…In curiosity I slowly inched my head to the side glancing through my bangs to observe him. I looked for only a few seconds before he noticed my eyes wondering over his face. Through the longs black hairs that spread across his face he looked over at me. Making contact for only a few seconds before I flinched my head away not wanting to repeat what had happened before the perverted interruption. Wait interruption…What would I have done if E would not have interfered? I would have turned away. Eventually.

My thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of my letter being called.

"A could you please enlighten our foolish students on the formal seven sins of humans that everyone seems to have carelessly not memorized yet." Announced Mr. Tamakiku In harsh voice to aid in intimidating the class.

I nodded my head in submission and began to speak loudly. They always chose me. Why wouldn't they? I am supposed to know more than the rest aren't I? It's what's expected, the satisfying looks on the teachers faces every time I successfully prove to be superior. And why shouldn't they? It's like seeing your prized item succeed; all the work they put into me, should they not feel as if I am but a prize piece of work?

"A lying tongue" L said that a lying monster is the worst? Do I lie? I suppose every human lies at some point. Does this make them a monster? No it couldn't possibly be that simple.

"A heart that devises wicked plots" This being the main reason as to why I have a purpose in life. Words are week but actions that come from those wicked plots are something to be feared.

"Hands that shed innocent blood" The actions taken by those foolish enough to be think of themselves as gods. The power to take someone's life..does the life of a monster apply to this. Per say taking my own life?

"Feet that are swift to run into mischief" Those feet travel too fast for my appeal such as E, he wasted no time.

" A deceitful witness that uttered lies" Every single person within the training grounds must be speaking of failure, all witnesses to my momentary laps.

"Him that discards among his own brethren" monsters have no brethren..

"And….." my voice began to crackle at the loss of words. The last one, what is it? My eyes showered the room with worry; the ears open wide to my words that could not seem to speak through my lips. My mouth still open waiting for the next words that seemed blank within my mind. The answer, WHAT IS IT!? My heart rate quicken at my sudden panic. My long pause caused some letters to turn their heads in question once realizing that I was speechless.

"A?" questioned , his face said it all. The confusion and disappoint resembled the look on Rogers face from my dream the night before. What do I do? There is nothing to be done but admit I forgot. What will he say? The look from him is torturing me.

"A proud look." Said a deeper yet humming voice that I know oh so well. Out of breathe as if I had run a marathon moments ago. I turned to stare at him. B. Who told him to interrupt I would have remembered! I didn't ask for him damn help!

"Yes thank you very much B, perhaps you should take some lessons from him A, seems as if you are slipping lately. So the seven sins are a fundamental aspect of what you all must know, one must completely understand them to understand mankind. You each possess all of these traits…."

A proud look something I know so well. The one sin that applies directly to me, what am I to my teachers and letters without my pride.

Take lessons from B? Slipping? That's right pride…he stole my pride.

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Hey guys! Thank you for the reviews I really appreciate it. Please let me know if you find anything you think needs fixing. The next chapter will contain some lashing out and a habit that starts between A and B.


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